rlfj: Blog

Somebody wrote the most amazing complaint about my writing: “I quit! Story comes across as having been written by a biased northern negro. MSM has enough of this!” A biased northern negro? I think the last time I heard somebody called a negro was at least fifty years ago. Hey, if you don’t like it, fine, but at least use an insult current within the last half century! I mentioned it to my wife, and she couldn’t remember that usage since the 1960s! MSM stands for - Main Stream Media. As one reader put it: “MSM=main stream media, aka what folks who get their “news” solely from Infowars call journalists of any flavor but their own.” Fascinating!

BTW, for the record, I am a white male born south of the Mason-Dixon Line and a politically moderate Independent.

The incident at Darton State occurred in January 2016. I remember that when it occurred several readers asked what Grim would have done. A little investigation showed that what occurred was nowhere near as awful as was initially portrayed. It really was a misunderstanding and was rectified almost immediately. One of my readers commented that since it disappeared from public knowledge quickly there must have been a conspiracy among academics and liberals to bury it. I offer another suggestion - Darton State no longer exists! A year later it was folded into Albany State University. As for the idiocy suggested, I can’t make this stuff up. Several schools have various liberal groups arguing for eliminating campus police departments. The bit about whistles is true! You can pick up your safety whistles at the Campus Safety offices at the University of Redlands in California and at Bates College in Maine (as of 2018.) No word on whether you should use them to create safe spaces, so you don’t have to hear unpleasant thoughts. My generation’s version of a safe space was dodging the draft and running away to Canada (or going to college in England and smoking pot but not inhaling.) This generation is a bunch of pussies! Then again, I’m just a cranky old fart.

This sort of thing can really happen. Heart attacks can be caused by increased cardiovascular activity, and if you do it right, sex can really increase cardiovascular activity! In my case, this happened twice. The first time, in 2008, I collapsed but blew it off and my wife didn’t push me to go to the hospital until the next day. On the TV shows the paramedics run an EKG and go, “Aha! Heart attack!” Yes, that can happen, but in a lot of cases, by the time they get there the event is over. At that point, the doctors do bloodwork and test for various trace chemicals given off by the heart under stress. If the chemicals are there, but the EKG looks good, it means you had a heart attack in the last 6-12 hours. However, if you delay going to the hospital, the chemicals dissipate and flush from your system.

After my second heart attack, in 2016, my wife made me call the emergency squad immediately. The EKG was clean, but the bloodwork showed I had a problem, so I ended up in the cath lab later that day. That’s the gold standard, and they discovered 70% blockage in the ‘widowmaker’. I ended up with a stent and the ability to continue giving my wife grief with my persistent existence.

Lots of readers laughed about the antics of Riley and Seamus and wondered why Riley Fox’s namesake wasn’t the worse of the two. Trust me, all three-year-olds are pains in the tail, no matter their sex or who they’re named after! I’ve had three children and five grandchildren. I know about three-year-olds! As for the line, “Oh no! It’s Tio Grim! Run for your lives!”, my son’s girls (11, 8, & 5 at the time) pulled that on me once when they stayed with us.

A final comment on politics. If I have a character in a story saying something political, from either side, it does not mean I agree with them. It means the character as written believes in it. If I were to write a story about the Second World War from the German perspective, it does not mean I am a Nazi. Blaming a writer for depicting the thoughts of a character is unfair to the writer and intellectually dishonest with yourself.

Finally, let’s take a break from politics and have a little fun. Does this story have anything to do with police work? Not really. Does this happen? You bet! Happened to me twice! I have taken to calling my wife the Black Widow. If you can’t have fun with a problem like the one the Reaper family is facing, your sense of humor has been surgically removed.

In any case, this story is one where the readers who want to see more of the extended Reaper family get their wish. Enjoy!

Patriots and Players is my most controversial story, and my most involved. It was originally written and posted on SOL in 2017 as a stand-alone story. I was considering adding to the GR universe and this was the first story I wrote after concluding the original story. It was extremely controversial at the time and got me huge blowback from some (but not all, by any stretch!) readers. Others agreed with me. It got very political, very fast, and only the fact that my email address was hidden kept me from getting death threats directly.

Within the next year I wrote the rest of ASLE and decided to incorporate P&P into it as one of the stories. It fits the time frame and helps to build towards the conclusion. I then took P&P down as a stand-alone.

Despite the animosity at the time, I am not ashamed to have written it and will stand by it. Whether you are a fan of DJT or not, some of what he does is sheer madness – he comes up with an idea and then just blurts it out to the world on social media, whether he has thought it through or not. While I like some of what he’s done and hate some of what he’s done, he is pure chaos.

Like Grim, I believe the players have the right to their opinions. Like Grim, I am not at all sure this is the best way to protest. I think the best response I got, and one of the most intelligent was from a reader, pcant:

“I felt the need to express another viewpoint. I do feel that the kneeling is disrespectful, but like Grim, I would never dispute someone else’s right to protest. My issue is the politicizing of a nonpolitical event. I can't think of any other profession (outside of Hollywood, a lost cause IMHO) where you can hold a protest, in corporate uniform, on the company's dime, and not get fired. If there are no consequences to a protest, then it's a pretty meager protest. If the football players have nothing to lose by protesting, then it doesn't mean much. I support their right to protest. That doesn't mean I wouldn't fire each and every one, given the opportunity. Let them protest before or after the game, in civilian clothes.”

He's right. At the time, I worked for my wife’s family, and I was a part owner of the company. This type of behavior by our employees would not have been tolerated. If I dressed in a corporate uniform and used corporate communications and corporate television to protest something, anything, my ass would be in the front office in a heartbeat. The second time I did it, I would be on the unemployment line, family or not.

Lots of elements in this story. The main story, about the Headless Horseman, was from a tale told me by a Texas police officer, and like Skinny Mike, the officer involved managed to get over the incident and went on to a long and honorable career in law enforcement. Several of the other stories I can personally bear witness to.

The story of the late-night antics in the Wal-Mart came courtesy of my wife, who used to be a graveyard shift cashier at a local grocery store. She would come home and tell me the damnedest tales of who and/or what came in at 2 or 3 in the morning. In one instance she reported a guy coming in stoned and looking for beer and condoms with what seemed to be the loose change he had pulled from the couch. I dread to think of what had happened to the poor couch! In another case a different gentleman came in looking for flowers and condoms, and then told my wife that if he didn’t have the one, he wouldn’t need the other. She couldn’t believe people would blurt out this stuff to total strangers. As for the outfits I described, just search for ‘ugly Walmart people photos’ and you will find many sites with pictures that will make you want to leave the species, also.

The accident on the highway in Alabama happened to me, though it was in Pennsylvania, not Alabama. As I mentioned, my beloved decided I needed to sleep on the couch for a few nights. I also had to hire a couple of criminal lawyers, one of whom had as his last defendant a serial killer named Lewis Lent. I used to drive home from work wondering if the NY State Police were going to be waiting for me in my driveway with a warrant. Just like in the story, I told my wife that my name and extradition are never used in the same sentence!

Enjoy!